Bad cramps

I've never lost a baby before. Even though mentally I am totally fine with what happened to me this morning... emotionally I am still struggling with it. I only found out I was pregnant a week ago. I was excited! It only took 1 month of trying, and BAM. My hormones were strong, and I was feeling great.

As I was baking cupcakes for my son's 6th birthday this morning, I started having cramps. Blaming them on constipation, I spent a while in the bathrooms, but finally gave up and got into bed. When I felt better, an hour or so later, I knew something was wrong as soon as I stood up. Sure enough.... my body expelled something that looked like a bloodclot.

I immediately was thankful for the fact that I hadn't broadcasted my pregnancy to the world. The people who knew can be counted on 2 hands. The trickiest part will be telling my 6 and 7 year old. How do you tell a first grader that the baby is now gone? Especially when they didn't believe you when you told them in the first place?

We'll just try again in a few months. Yes, I'm sad. But, also very happy that it happened sooner rather than later.

Bad Attendance

My blog attendance has been very bad lately. Sorry for that. I have a few ideas, but somehow don't ever sit and write them.

Sterling is turning 6 tomorrow! Since we are going on vacation, and the grandparents wouldn't be able to get here until later at night, we decided to celebrate it this past Sunday. Joe got him a trailer bike, which they enjoyed riding together, a few days ago. Other than that, he got a bionicle, fake money, little dollar store gifts, and maybe we'll get him a duck after our trip.

Facts about our 6 year old Sterling

• Stuffed animals have always been close to his heart
• He likes to sleep with his John Deere Quillo
• He's currently taller than his older sister
• He is starting to read
• He is camera shy, just like his dad
• He's a nice kid (by Winter)
• Favorite food: pizza
• Favorite animal: cats
  
• He lost his first tooth a few weeks ago
• Favorite place in the whole world: Disneyworld
• Favorite person: grandma
• He likes to ride his bike
• He sleeps with his door open, and a night light

We sure love our little-big boy!

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Albertsons Monopoly Game

Updated 3/10/2009

Here in Texas, Albertsons has started a fun new game where you collect little tokens, for a chance to win a variety of prizes. I just thought I would let everyone know I am playing this game, and if you shop at Albertsons and don't want/need your tickets, I will be more than happy to take them from you. Or, if you want to trade for tickets that I need, I am willing to give you many tickets! Also, if you have 1 of the 2 rare pieces in the car categories, maybe we can both win something!

Tickets I have for trade:
A02, A03, A05, A06
B07, B09, B11
C14, C15, C16
D18, D19, D21
E23, E24, E26
F27, F28, F29, F31
G32, G33, G34
H36, H38, H39
I40, I41, I43
J44, J45, J47,
K49, K50, K51
L52, L53, L55
M56, M58, M59
N60, N61, N62
P65, P66, P67
Q68, Q70, Q71
R73, R74, R75
S77, S79

Tickets I need:
A01, A04
B08 - I have B10, if you have B08, we could split the winnings
C12, C13
D17, D20
E22, E25
F27
F30
G35
H37
I42
J46
K48
L54
M57
N63
P64
Q69
R72

Good luck, and have fun!

Bunny snack

Remember our Semi-wild bunny? He ran into our 22. I'll take full responsibility. I feel bad, but not bad enough; not to go back and do it again. At least my dog is having a fresh dinner.

Before you proclaim me as a barbarian, let me just explain my reasoning. Last year my vegetable garden failed miserably. It was a combination of watering, bugs, and bad luck. This year I decided to give it another try. I worked hard to rototille (ok, joe did the actual work). I planted out in the horrid wind, and have been watering my little plants religiously. Today, when I went out there, practically all of my cauliflowers plants, and half of my brussels sprouts plants were gone. Nibbled off, eaten! And I know the criminal. I saw him sitting there, a happy wild bunny, and I flipped.

The gun case was opened. Bullets were loaded. And the husband was put in service to execute.
The bunny was shot, bled and died a peaceful death. (and then was happily consumed by our doggy Justin). It all comes down to the circle of life. Man, I'm sounding harsh, but that's just the way I feel this minute. Anyways... now I will go back to the store to buy yet more plants, waste yet more money and time, and hope and pray another bunny won't come along for a snack

Saturdays suck

As a kids I looked forward to the weekend. Weekends meant, time off, fun things, and variety. As a teenager I went to a horse riding club every Saturday morning. I would often ride my bike 45 minutes each way, in rain or shine, and no matter the wind. Even though sometimes I detested my bike, I think I also really enjoyed it. That's one of the things I miss a lot about Holland... the biking. There, you just don't have money for more than 1 car (if 1 car), and everything is so close, that most is accessible by bike, or if not by bike, definitely by public transportation. Then, going into college, the weekends meant dates, fun activities, and a break from school. I guess looking forward to weekends for the first 21 years of my life, really sunk into my psyche.

Now weekends mean more work, same old things, and more work. We have so many things to get done around the house, we rarely go on dates, and lets face it: when the husband and kids are home, there's just more work to be done in general (disclaimer, Joe is a great helper). I just need to get over the fact that weekends are not a fun free-for-all anymore. Maybe, when we are millionaires, can hire housekeepers, and handymen for all the projects, we can go back to the blissdom of fun filled weekends. Don't get me wrong, we occasionally still do fun things, but I would say that 95% of our weekends are of the more boring variety. Sorry for the whining... just had to let it out!

Number 4

The plus sign appeared as soon as the pee hit the stick. Supposedly it takes up to 2 minutes to see results, but not for me, not this time! Some calculations later, I came up with a due date of November 5th, 2009. After Ginger was born I was sure I was done having kids. 3 was plenty, and they kept me busy. Convinced I bore all the kids I was meant to, I got some good birth control, and got in shape. I loved having my body back!

But about 2 years ago, I started yearning for another child. Adoption has always been something I wanted to do, so we started with the process. First we got licensed with a private adoption agency, and when that didn't bring any results, we added foster/adoption to the mix. Now, 6 months later, still without results, we started thinking about pregnancy again. All of a sudden those extra 30 pounds didn't matter so much any more. I would do anything to hold another newborn in my arms. Don't get me wrong, we still want to do foster/adoption, but I also wanted an option that I have control over. If everything goes right, I'll have that newborn in my arms, less than 8 months from now.

I was so excited to see the positive pregnancy test, and literally started shaking. I was excited and nervous at the same time. It seems like a long time ago that I did all of this pregnancy stuff. I mean, for a while there, I was an expert! I had 3 kids in 4 years. Now, my body older, and failing ever so slightly, I can only anticipate the issues I might have. Ginger gave me terrible lower back pains the 9th month, so I REALLY hope that won't happen again!

In addition to the unknowns, I have also let myself get out of shape the past few months. I just about fell over when I got on the scale. I haven't been this heavy since my last kid was 3 months old! So, tonight, at 10.15pm, I got off the couch and did an exercise DVD. Probably not the best idea, but I just HAD to do something now! After I gained a whopping 40 pounds with Winter's pregancy, I swore I would never gain that much again! So I had Joe hide all my chocolate, and I plan to keep the scale in plain view. I really just dont' want a 10 lb baby, you know?

Even with these challenges, I am super excited, and can't wait if I should buy some more boy or girl clothes.

I didn't post this when I wrote it, because I thought it wise to wait until things were a little further along

The poll told me...

The overwhelming 69% majority voted for cutting Ginger's hair. Keeping my word to do whatever the poll told me, I got the scissors out today.

Before

After

Looking at these pictures, I think I might cut off even a little bit more from the back.
I really like it. It reminds me of her haircut when she was just a baby